Self-love – what is it for you? 15 consequences of lack of loveLove doesn’t hurt. It is the lack of love that causes pain. First of all, the lack of self-love. The human being will be inclined to love himself according to the perception he had of love as a child. The way he was loved will influence his life and his relationship with him and others.
Well lived, love for oneself creates a state of well-being, respect, deep serenity, self-esteem, confidence and joie de vivre. It brings inner stability that allows you to stay strong in the face of adversity and to enjoy everyday life with more harmony.
What is Self-love?
A good personal valuation opens the way for you to create a fulfilling life on the relational, romantic, professional and other levels, from which emerges a sweet feeling of achievement based on the inner strength brought to the fore.
Unfortunately, a majority of people see these ideals tarnished by a lack of resources and understanding of the emotional mechanisms that govern humans. This is so since it is not taught extensively in school and past generations did not really pass these elements on in general. Survival came before the analysis of behavioural patterns that create or hinder happiness.
A feeling of limitation can then be felt and this is very human. Hence the importance of seeking support when needed. There comes a time when it is desirable to mourn old habits and ways of thinking and to use our wounds as a springboard for self-discovery, instead of letting them become like a downward spiral that extinguishes the drive for life. Lack of self-love traps in a feeling of not having enough power over one’s life.
Each of us has more fragile, injured inner areas, but it is not by constantly focusing on them and complaining that we rise. Rather, it is by giving ourselves what we would like others to give us.
For example, if you are tired of meeting people who lie and betray you, what are you lying to and betraying yourself about? This is an important avenue for returning to self-love and making wise choices based on learning from the happy and painful experiences of the past.
Learning to love yourself is to welcome you as much within your limits as through your strengths. It’s a new way of living and seeing yourself. Think of a little child: you see him, you welcome him as he is. It’s about doing the same with yourself and with your hurting inner little child. Reassure him, give him tenderness, compassion and listening and allow him to cry as needed to empty the overload and name the emotions that have so long been muted. The more you love yourself for what you are and not just for what you do, the more others will reflect that mirror back to you and the more well-being can grow.
It is essential to give yourself the right to be surrounded by good people and not to tolerate what pulls you down. If your surroundings are unhealthy, this is a great signal to reconsider your love for yourself and your self-esteem. Read, learn about these topics, go to meetings, but take action today. One small step at a time is even better than the vain hope of a tomorrow that could be better if nothing is done. It is about your life, your happiness your success and your health.
These 15 examples are potential indicators of a lack of self-love:
1. We observe at home the fear of displeasing and submission.
2. There is a recurring feeling of unease that can arise because the life drive does not fully come alive in oneself.
3. There is a risk of forgetting oneself to collect crumbs of love from others.
4. There may be a lack of self-respect, difficulty in saying no and taking one’s place.
5. Unfortunately, there is some denial of its full value.
6. One can experience feelings of rejection, abandonment, humiliation, betrayal, injustice and non-recognition which hurt, but which are in fact indicators of what is to be transformed in oneself.
7. There is a lack of listening to the crying needs in oneself.
8. The lack of gentleness, affection and empathy for oneself is present.
9. A feeling of being a victim of situations instead of finding oneself in full self-responsibility, can emerge in the face of one’s happiness. Reactions to those around you, just like to events, provide information on what needs to be changed in oneself. If we are in harmony, the environment is in harmony and so are our relationships. We no longer attract the same things.
10. There is the possibility of a feeling of inner emptiness and separation from oneself.
11. Not knowing how to love himself, the person devalues himself and does not know how he would like to be loved.
12. Emotional overloads prevent the free flow of love and create a tunnel vision that prevents one from fully seeing the possibilities of inner liberation.
13. The person can try to give themselves a strong appearance but this can hide a great fragility.
14. There may be a notion of non-merit if the person has often been told that they are not worth much.
15. Lack of self-love creates emotional dependence and the need to revalue oneself under the gaze of others.
To love yourself more, it is important:
• To give you kindness, respect for yourself, moments of pleasure, gentleness and full of appreciation, if only in the smallest things accomplished.
• To think about you on a daily basis to gradually create an inner current that will feel like a kind of rebirth, peace, joy and pride.
• Make the decision to choose to be happy and act in that direction.
• To give your best to yourself as you would to others.
• Avoid being alone with your suffering.
Although summary, these few thoughts aim to help you continue this process of gentleness, tenderness and love for you with maximum pride. This subject could be the subject of so many books. You will therefore understand that the purpose of this article is to bring you to promote this return to your heart through certain reflections. These life situations affect us all at one time or another in our life. We all do the best we can, so no guilt! If your journey has been difficult, the important thing is to decide now what you will do with the rest of your life to make it better.
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